Singleman Christmas

Well, it's 3:30am in the morning and I can't sleep. I'm swimming in 3hrs time so no point in trying to force sleep, it's the last day at work before the Christmas break I've got my chrimbotica Christmas jumper and am all set so don't know why I can't sleep. Well I probably do but don't won't to admit it-yet. I'm writing this post but my mind is more on my next one, the title is going to be 'Christmas sex v everyday sex', I have theory for 'kin everything. Off to make a quick flat white! Mmmmm love coffee most in the morning!,

So, a week ago I was asked to go round a friends house to 'help' them with their Christmas decorations. I was warned that it was a chaotic affair with lots to drink and eat with family, friends and boyfriends all adding to the 'Christmas spirit'! As usual, I rode down to decompress at the end of the week hmmmmm, the usual excuse. My first job was to help my friend get the decorations down from the loft , hundreds of black bags littered the floor full of all sorts of mysteries, not really difficult. But then, the children arrive, the boss starts to input and the 'Christmas spirit' really starts and mainly consists of:
1. Really, really questionable music
2. Arguments
3. Rearrangement of decorations
4. Arguments
5. Dodgy music
6. Repeat repeat repeat

Until, eventually, several hours later this!

Then, the boyfriends arrived, family friends arrived, food served and home made cider demolished and there is dancing, weird singing, tall tales, sloppy hugs and then even sloppier goodbyes.

I cycled home, again not feeling any pain and started on my decorations which consists of taking my knitted Christmas tree out of its bag and plugging in the lights.


Until, eventually, several seconds later this!

I don't know  which Christmas experience was the best, but I did learn one thing. My friends homemade cider tastes lovely but is absolutely fukin potent! I woke up the following day, went to go for a ride only to find I'd ridden home with two punctures without knowing and actually it wasn't morning but afternoon. Forget the Christmas spirit, it's Christmas cider for me from now on!!

Next post-the sex post!!!

1969 Led Zep

Just remembered that I was going to write about a weird connection I made when riding into Mordor a while back, when I clipped a little dog.

I must have been 5 year old, possibly younger. I can remember the day really well. My uncle was at university and he had just returned home for the Christmas break and he had brought home loads of records that he used to play there. On this day he shared some with me and it was when I can first remember hearing electric guitar and it was awesome-all the classics, including Led Zep.

Later that evening my dad suggested going to the off licence to buy a few bottles of beer for him and his brother. Well, my dad was a cop and he used to ride a huge black police bicycle and he used to let me sit on the crossbar, feet on the down tube with my hand on the bars, used to love it. The thing had dyno powered front and rear lights. The front casting a waxy yellow glow that barely reached to the ground.

After picking up the beer we rode home. My dad decided to take a short cut over some rough ground that included a down hill bit. Here's what I had always remembered. We were riding downhill, I had an itchy wool jumper on, I could hear the beer bottles clinking in a blue shopping bag. The next thing I remember was the bike hitting something solid, being thrown over the bars into the air long enough to think before hitting the ground. I remember my dad swearing, me landing on the bag of bottles and a really blurry image/outline of something creamy white. My dad asked if I was alright, was the beer alright and I asked if we had just seen a ghost. I still remember dad not having an answer which was really unlike him.


Really spooked me all my life, not knowing what we hit despite having an image of something until the ride the other day, I really had no idea what we had hit. The Led Zep link is because my uncle was playing Ramble On when we got in. Well, as my mind was wandering during the ride I described the other day, the memory of the mystery ride with my dad came storming back into my mind - when I
hit the dog. Then, hey presto, there in my mind was the missing piece. A golden retriever. The creamy solid object that we had hit, was a golden retriever. I can now see it as clear as day! Weird how the incident, images and music caused me to fill in a missing mental jigsaw piece. Weird!

Tried to upload a pic but my machine has just shit the bed! So:
Reading: Neal Asher Polity Series
Listening to: Mitch Laddie Band
Learning: Limelight guitar solo

Close call, or just perfect timing?

Not the post I was going to write, a bit unplanned really and it all revolves around friends and food.
It all started yesterday after the gym. I called at my friends cafe to start the day with an early morning healthy breakfast of salmon, eggs, spinach etc and ended up with this perfect beast.

Mmmm! Yummy gooey perfection. Then went round to my local music store to see how a friend had connected up his new/old TEAC reel to reel. You wouldn't believe it,  perfect. Even customers in the shop were commenting on the quality of the sound and how easy and natural it was to listen to.

Jump forward to today and after getting home after the last of my Christmas shopping and I get a phone call from a friend.
"Hi, would you like to come round to mum and dads for Sunday dinner."
This post should be called friends and food!
This is what I got!!

All lovely, complete with a couple of glasses of wine. But, and there always is one, I'd decided to cycle down, using my bike as mode of transport, unglamorous, unsexy just functional. Now the last time I visited these friends in the summer, for a bbq I ended up getting very well oiled, cycling home in the early hrs of the morning, with a very ropey head torch, several large trout in my jersey pockets whilst dodging sci fi dogs with LEDs .

Back to tonight, my friends were insistent that they give me a lift home as it had started snowing but I was having non of it, so off I set. Into the rain, sleet, hail then snow.

Hmmm, half way home and it became obvious that the cold has sapped my battery more than expected.

But then out of the gloom! One of my local pubs. Ha ha!

So, in for a quick warm up, both me and my battery then on home.

Just as I got home, the red light of doom!

And then some really bad weather!

Close call? Nah,  perfect timing!

Anal v digit?

Analogue v digital, vinyl v cd, valves transistors, what is best? Have been thinking about this all weekend as am not racing because I have far too much green stuff in my nose and lungs; I really hate viruses! And, due to the fact that I live at over 1,000 feet, the northern weather has been shite for riding. Here is a pic of the climb out the back of where I live.

Beautiful, barren and bloody cold in the wind! What really gets the pulse going are the 50mph+ downhills with surface run off from the fields, that whilst only a foot or two wide with the odd one frozen certainly focuses the mind. Not wise to do when not on top form.

Well, back to the question, what is the best? I have gradually being rediscovering the delights of vinyl as a format for storing and listening to music. My friend had really pestered me to by a budget
turntable because she said, "You'll really love it and you can start collecting something else other than bikes and guitars." Well, a year later and I did as she suggested and it was nothing short of an
epiphany.

To put it into context I clearly remember an event that happened over 30 years ago. After spending all of my student grant on the best hi fi system I could find I can still remember the first CD players hitting the shops. I left university and spent my first pay cheque on a technics CD player, basking in the clarity of the horns on Simple Red's Holding Back The Years. That was it, CDs were the way forward, cars, Walkmans, the future was here and it was perfect in all its digital glory.

Fast forward to now and why I know vinyl is really, really the best...............for me! The reason why I have come to this conclusion is quite simple - emotions! When I first stared to notice music it was in vinyl format and the period was my early to late teens, some of the most emotionally formative years, or so I've been told. When I first listened to vinyl, the second time round (Hemispheres and
Strangeways Here We Come), I had an unexpected emotional response, a bit like the response I probably had the first time I heard them. But, it was not just the music it was the way in which it was reproduced with the limits of vinyl etc. Possible nostalgia but I think more to do with the whole listening experience which was more 'comforting' or 'familiar' for want of better terms. Anyway, I prefer it and am enjoying listening to music more. What's really weird is that I was reading an article by Billy Bragg recently in which he claims music for him was about rebellion, expression, searching etc and he thinks that has now been replaced by social media for a generation who don't look to music to poke the system. Interesting idea, not sure I agree but may help explain why somethings are going the way they are.

Anyway, got me thinking about how we come to the conclusion that certain  things are better than others when there are so many factors involved - often at a basic level, when I stumbled across this picture. It's obvious to me which one is best!!

It's obvious, for simple reasons, which one is best!

Highs, lows and highs again

I did say cyclocross is a sport that involved mud! Well on Saturday we got more than our fair share of it. The guys running lower tyre pressures seemed to be struggling more than those running slightly higher ones. Higher pressures cut through the surface layer of mud to find grip underneath. Well, what a race, got gridded again and it was an explosive start with riders quickly sorting themselves into some sort of order. Start of the second lap and the course was starting to really cut up. By this time I had forgotten about my poorly leg and started to really enjoy the conditions.

I could make up time where the course was more technical but was losing time on the flatter sections. Uphill and downhill great, flat - crap, same as when I used to time trial. Hmmm will have to think about that. Penultimate lap a faster rider who was struggling in the conditions caught up with me. We had a friendly chat, gasp, chat, gasp, grunt, snort chat then started to work together. He stuck the knife in on the flats and I demoralised him on the technical bits. Last lap he pulled away, then on a really slippery off-camber 180 degree turn I got past him and held on to sprint to the line, beating someone in a sprint finish (well mid pack moral victory) for the first time in years. We shook hands

after the race and re-lived the last lap and a half a dozen times! Fab fab fab!

Best result so far, just 6 min (under a lap behind the winner!)

So onto the low. Got to the venue where Vintage Trouble were playing that evening,  and the band, they were alright, pedestrian, easy, mundane I don't know but was talking to the bass player of the MLB in the shop where he works earlier in the day  and mentioned how I was aware of how I hadn't enjoyed the last gig I went to. He thought I was playing it safe with my choices and he could have right. It was just - alright. Not what I expected from their music and appearances on Jools Holland etc. Disappointed....



And the final high, my new bike and wheels are ready for pick up this week- great service Infinity!

So,  am looking forward to faffing with that, the next race in two weeks and returning to full fitness.

Catching up with me mate this week who's getting married next year, he keeps asking me how  my best man's speech is coming on, eh it's nearly  a year way so I will have to  be reflecting on that process. And I did mention a reference in my last post about the Led Zep link from 1969, but more of that next time.

And, bloody Billy Bragg!

And my first steps playing guitar with somebody else. Bricking it already and it's not even a deffo!

Another balls up

Had it all planned. The idea being to nurse my injury for the rest of this week before entering my next race the weekend after next. Checked the events calendar to find out it's this weekend! So a a couple of late night 'training/rehab' rides have been in order, and the outcome - think my leg is 80 percent but more importantly I've rediscovered what a total blast it is riding flat out on remote tracks on the hills near where I live, in total darkness. Here is pic I took this evening on my way out.

It really does the senses the world of good. Hearing, smell and peripheral vision are so heightened, it's really a bit unreal. And, I had a barn owl fly in formation with me for a few metres, tiny thing but still scared the crap out of me.

Going to see Vintage Trouble at the weekend too. Gonnna be a good one!

PS to self. Have just posted this after reading my post stats, interestingly seven people in the States have read some of my posts. Hmmm .......

Ramble On

That's what I'm gonna do - just ramble on. Really weird how the human brain works. Recently got sent this lovely picture from a friend who is just starting out on her painting journey.

Hope she is going to paint it one day so I can put it on my wall. So, out again today on the bike testing my leg hoping to get back to the gym this Sunday and some decent miles in before my next race in two weeks time. Thought nothing about the picture, just liked it.

Earlier today, riding along, I could see a man sat on a bench, walking sticks and an expanding
waistline that had been carefully cultivated and maintained in our many local drinking venues. He
verbalised something that I didn't catch, not sure if it was aimed at me or his surroundings in general
but as I pulled level with him a little scabby terrier sort of dog thingy nonchalantly ambled out of the
long grass beside the  track. Right in front of me. It was the total opposite, looking nothing like its owner being skinny with an intelligent glint in its eye. Braking hard I turned and muttered, " That was close."

 He replied with, "I fuckin told you!"

Hmmm, dealing with unprovoked aggression not being a strength and combined with an
uncontrollable urge to poke, provoke, pinch and tweak I replied with, "It's only a dog!". At which point he got up and gave chase screaming, "I'll fuckin it's only a dog you!".  The guy could move, I
had to sprint, praying my poorly leg would hold out. Then the man mountain threw his walking sticks at me, I was almost tempted to turn round, pick up his sticks and ride off with them!! His dog, I noticed over my shoulder, was taking a shit.

Anyhow, continued riding hoping to beat the weather, which had started to look like this. Now, the
thing that caught my eye was the light ring of cloud in the centre or the picture, and that was it, total weirdo brain connection thingy!!

So I now think I'm heading into Mordor, what with the ring thing and general feeling of doom and foreboding as a result of my previous encounter and the fact that it was highly likely I would have to pass him later - the route I took today was an out and back.  Then my mind fills with Led Zeppelin's Ramble On, complete with references to Gollum and Mordor! Then I remember this picture from the other day.

Then I recall this image, from travelling the images of Tolien's settings for work.

Then I think,"How fuckin coincidental is that!" 

Then I remember that Ramble On was a Page/Plant composition from 1969,  possibly a reference to Tolkien's 'Namarie',  and that took me to a genuinely odd moment - but more of that in the next post.

 Anyway, on the way back and a Gollum of my own. I passed the twin peaks of of doom that I had missed on the way out. There in the grass at the side of the track,  were the twin, pasty white spotty buttocks of a large man, head and hands buried in the deep grass. "Can I help?" I offered.

"I've lost me walking sticks!" Came the reply. As I looked over my shoulder, the scrabby little terrier thingy was taking another shit!

Funny how the mind works.

Wine and music

Why does wine make music sound better and music make wine taste better? Mmmmm to chilled Chardonnay and on fire Wolf Alice!

Think this burned railway sleeper is giving the finger!!

Ignoring advice and doing what's right

Enough of sitting around being a right miserable git, decided to go for a ride against all the advice from friends, relatives, medical staff and anybody else who chipped in with an opinion. Well, found out I can ride okay but still walk with a funny little hoppy limp shuffle thing. Well worth it, enjoyed the early evening ride and caught some good pics. Missed a call from a friend which could have resulted in a very nice evening which is a shame but never mind. Put some SRV on, broke open the wine and decided to save these pics.

Sometimes forget, but this is why I ride bikes!!

Whimper

I've never been shot and I honestly hope I never will be. But that's what I thought had happened a couple of weeks ago. It was during the first lap of a local cyclocross race, I started to dismount in preparation for the first flight of steps (cyclocross - a weird sport that involves a lot of mud) when I really thought I'd been shot in my right leg, right calf to be precise. I actually let out a noise that started out shout but quickly became stifled to a whimper as part of my brain registered children spectating and a clear reference in the rules that swearing is not big or clever.

50 minutes later I finished only to find I couldn't walk properly or depress the accelerator or brake pedal without considerable pain. A handful of suitable painkillers (amazing the drugs available at grass roots cycling events) and an inappropriate amount of caffeinated beverage allowed me to drive home safely. Judgement may have been somewhat impaired, as for some reason I took a detour to a new bike shop where I ended up buying a new bike and some new wheels. God knows why!

So, here I sit, torn calf muscle (grade 2/3) new bike, new wheels new race season and some okayish results reflecting on stuff. The idea behind this blog is to chronicle/archive a year in my ordinary life as I try to muddle through, sorting things as they happen, making plans then abandoning them and so on, with the intention of looking back to see what, if anything, I have learned by this time next year.

Books reading: Neal Asher Owner Trilogy
Music listening to: wolf Alice
Learning: Gary Clark Jr When My Train Comes In